Recently a housemate of ours moved out. The guy was a serious food thief and all-round scumbag. This morning I discovered that right under my nose, the SOB had cleaned out a two-thirds full jar of Impress chocolate sandwich spread I owned. The joke’s on him though, as I have a habit of dipping a knife or spoon into such jars and eating the spread while I make lunch. Enjoy my saliva, you little &£$%.